Solo Travel Taught Me Who I Am—And I Loved Who I Found.
When people hear the words “solo travel,” they often imagine someone alone in a foreign country, searching for something. For me, solo travel hasn’t been about being alone. It’s been about coming home to myself. As a wife, mother, and proud pet owner, my life has always centered around others. My days once revolved around making sure everyone else was fed, cared for, scheduled, and supported. And while I wouldn’t trade those roles for anything, I eventually realized I had lost something along the way—me. That’s where solo travel stepped in.
Relearning Myself, One Trip at a Time
My first solo trip wasn’t planned to be some grand self-discovery journey. I just needed a break—a moment to breathe. But something shifted the moment I landed. With no one to consult, compromise with, or care for, I had to ask myself a question I hadn’t asked in a long time: What do I want? Where do I want to go? What do I want to eat? Do I feel like sleeping in or waking up early for a sunrise walk? Do I want a spa day, or just a long, quiet afternoon by the water? I didn’t need to ask for permission or explain myself. I became the itinerary. And let me tell you—that freedom was everything.
Taking Myself Out—Literally
One of my favorite solo travel rituals is taking myself out to dinner. No distractions. No back-and-forth over where to go or what cuisine to choose. Just me, dressed for me, seated by a window, ordering whatever I want, however I like it. That first solo dinner felt strange at first—I won’t lie. But somewhere between the appetizer and dessert, I found joy in the quiet. I paid attention to the flavors, the ambiance, and my own thoughts. I didn’t have to entertain anyone, I didn’t have to compromise, and I didn’t have to pretend. That night, I didn’t just feed my body—I fed my soul.
You Become the Destination
There’s beauty in not having an itinerary. Waking up with nothing planned and asking yourself, ‘What feels good today?’ Sometimes it’s wandering through a market. Other days, it’s getting lost in a museum or journaling in a tucked-away café for hours. Solo travel offers a rare opportunity to follow your curiosity without judgment. To rediscover what inspires you. To move at your rhythm without apology. And when you’re used to putting everyone else first, those moments feel like a reclamation.
I’m Still a Wife, Mother, and Pet Owner—But I’m Also Me
Let’s be clear: I love my life. I love my family. I love my sweet Lexie, who’s traveled halfway across the world with me. But I also love myself enough to step away sometimes. To center my joy. To chase stillness or adventure without needing anyone else to come along. Solo travel taught me that I’m not defined solely by the roles I play for others. I’m a whole person—curious, creative, bold—and I deserve time and space to nourish that part of me.
The Real Gift: Confidence
Solo travel didn’t just teach me about what I enjoy—it reminded me of what I’m capable of. Navigating a new city, figuring out logistics, and facing the unexpected—it builds confidence that spills into every other part of life. Now, even when I’m not traveling, I carry that same solo-travel energy into my everyday life. I speak up more. I take myself out more. I trust my own voice more. Because once you learn to enjoy your own company, you stop waiting on others to validate your worth.
If you’ve never traveled solo, let me say this from experience: you don’t have to wait for someone else to be ready. Your journey is yours. And sometimes, the most meaningful destination isn’t a place—it’s you. So, take the trip. Book the table for one. Wander without an agenda. And let yourself fall in love with the person you find along the way. You are the itinerary. And you’re worth following.
Have you ever traveled solo or taken time to reconnect with yourself? Share your experience at www.ebonytravelers.com or tag @EbonyTravelers—I’d love to hear how you’ve rediscovered your power, one trip at a time.
